I say "Good for them for they are weak...."
Seems to me that everyone is into some sort of 12 step program - 12 steps to losing weight, 12 steps to this or that addiction program, 12 steps to a better marriage or 12 steps to becoming a better _______program. Dr. Phil (seriously, that is his name - how can you take him serious?) had a shortened version - 10 Steps to Relationship Rescue (I say he did it because he could not think of 2 more - but I could be wrong). As I was walking through the book store, I saw a whole section on these subjects. If you have a problem - then there is 12 step solution for you. I have also noticed that many organizations (including churches) have attempted to get in on the game with recovery programs and group discussions - all in some sort of celebration atmosphere. It is possible that these programs work and I am sure each of us know someone that went through one (I am sorry - IS working through, since I am told one never really recovers - it is a process) and swears that the program changed their life. Once the program is "complete", a celebration acknowledging the achievement or the path to recovery is held. To which I reply:
"Good for them for they are weak...."
I am not against people fixing their lives. I am a big proponent of change. I am also a realist. People do not change, the situations do. I can put on a leisure suit with a silk shirt and dance under a disco light - but that will not make me John Travolta. People that know me may say - "Hey, don't you read all of those self-help books - what is the difference? You are just a hypocrite, Chip". To which I reply - "Yes, I do read them. I have also read Playboy - but that does not make me Hugh Hefner". The difference is I don't have a "to do" program - I have a "don't do" program. If I want to make a change - I stop doing the behavior I want to change. Cold. One day. Just stop. Period. Covey wrote in the The Seven Habit of Highly Effective People "Begin with the End in Mind" - to me the rest of the book is just filler (good filler - but filler none the less). Some will tell me "Good for you, Chip. A lot of people cannot do that." To which I reply:
"Good for them for they are weak...."
12 steps - Really??? I know many people that believe in them, support them, offer comfort to them and celebrate with them - them being the people I think (although I am sure that to many the program is more important than the people). Here is a thought - mind you - it is just a thought....how about BEFORE the problem becomes an issue - you pull them aside and institute like a 1 step program to change the behavior. It would make for a shorter book, a shorter meeting (would not have time for the doughnuts and all of that SHARING stuff), but also a shorter cycle of bad Karma....It won't happen....people don't want to interfere until another hits the bottom or until the person decides to change....It is not easy to get one's attention when he or she appear to be at the top of the mountain. If you really want to help - do it in the beginning - not wait for the down fall. Some will say you find out who your friends are when you hit rock bottom. I say your real friends never let you get there. Some will say "but that is way too much interference - I don't want to mettle, plus they might get mad at me" to which I reply:
"Good for them for I am NOT weak - I will "
Which is my 1 step program - I will. Right Now. No excuses. No ifs. No ands. No buts.. I will never be the prodigal son - for I rarely ever leave the path less traveled for long - if it is to be - then it is up to me - I am the way...12 steps are for those that only wish to go 3/4 of one flight...
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