I have won a few bar bets with it. Actually, I often win by a fairly LARGE margin - "it" is well above average in its breath. An added bonus are all the phone numbers from really attractive women - but what can I do --- I was just endowed with this gift. :) Pretty simple really- I get into a discussion, ok perhaps even a little bragging and WaLA...I just whip it out and show it off. Women in particular are amazed, I have even seen a couple of them blush over the years. Great ego boost if I were into that kind of thing. As for the men, what can most say? They just turn around and walk away - no need to stay and try to match me. It is one thing to see it in its FULL glory, it is another to try to match it and just get humiliated. I must admit, I never really knew how powerful a "tool" it was until I reached my 20's. Since I have a relatively small frame, I am not eye catching as I walk into a room. Oh, I am tall enough at almost 6 feet and I weigh ok at 186, but I am not imposing. That is what is so cool about it. No, correction, what is so cool about it is the odd places that I just show "it" off. I once was in a college class - bored to tears and I was sitting next to a former University of Alabama QB1 (guess he just had to graduate somewhere else - Jacksonville State U). Anyway - he and I started talking and like a lot of conversations guys have, we both were boisterous and our conversation was filled with bravado. I knew I had my secret weapon - even though he was this Greek God specimen. After a little while, I just reached down and pulled "it" out. He could not believe that I would do it I guess - whatever - I like shock value. But with all things good - some bad comes. Our conversation had gotten the attention of a couple of really cute girls. One of them turned around to look at the former QB and smiled. She then looked at me up and down and said "Baby, if this guy (pointing at the former QB) had what you have - he would be the perfect guy". I think I may have blushed. I just adjusted in my seat, I did not mean to cause a distraction. Too late, the instructor, noticed and told me to stay after class - she said I had some explaining to do. I stayed - but that is another story.........
Over the years, I have lost track of how many women I have used it on. While this may come as a shock to some of you - I have used it on many men too. Funny how the lines blur when you are having "fun". With age and practice, comes wisdom and endurance. I am at the point now, where I can last a really long time. Usually, by the time I am ready to finish, the person or persons ( yea baby!!!) around me are just plain worn out. I am a little embarrassed to write this - (but as I age I am trying to be more candid and open) - I take some enhancements. Didn't always - but I am also ALMOST 50 and a little help now and then keeps me going ALL NIGHT LONG... Yep - a little enhancer to make it bigger...what a concept.
Pointed conversation is my "IT" and "IT" has a couple of friends hanging around Dry Wit and Charm. I am not the best looking guy you will ever see nor the smartest person you will talk with, but if I can make you laugh just a little on a bad day - maybe you will have more good days. Some people will not finish this blog for it offended them as it was read - and that's too bad.. A "blind" ear to humor will cause you to experience darkness in your vision of the world. As for the "enhancers" - well no better humor than the "News" channels.....which reminds me - "Sarah, when is your new book coming out? I got a title for you "Dancing with the Caribou + 8"....... May your day be filled by someone with a big "IT" :)
No comments:
Post a Comment