You fill in the _________ for YOU - not me.....and do it everyday and see if the following makes sense - in say - 1 year. Don't have a year? Yep - that's what you said last year - yet here you are....
Recently, I was talking with a guy and he said "I wish I could talk about anything to anybody like you do". Flattery works well with humans - some days it pays to be human in species only - so I don't bite. My response could have been more polite, but as with most answers in my life - I selected the truth - "No, you don't really" I got that line from Gary Player (the golfer). I went on that day to paraphrase Mr. Player , so my discussion was not about golf , but on one of 4 things I do fairly well. I finished my answer with: "because if you did, you would do what I do. In 2010, I read 72 books, I made over 100 hours of audiotape of me practicing words, phrases, and voice inflection. I have many hours of video tape so that I can study my body language. I listen to people I can't stand to watch even breathe, much less agree with, just so I can gain the perspective of both sides of any discussion. I practice interactions with store clerks, bankers, school personnel, janitors, and the guy asking for money on the corner. I have been doing this for 20 plus years. I make it a point to talk to 10 people I don't know each and every day - even on Christmas Day." He looked surprised and doubtful. I went on to say "The Christmas Day got you didn't it? Well, every Christmas for the past 7 years I have driven from my house to pick up a family member to bring back to my home. On that trip I stop at Walgreen's. Not to shop, but to talk with people, the clerks, the shoppers - anyone. I don't talk long - they are in a hurry - or sad or just looking for redemption as they buy a toy for a child. So, YES, everyday"
When I relay this story to people I get a similar reaction to what that guy heard and said that day. "You really do that? I don't have that kind of time to work on just talking". See how the thought changed - once the person realized that there was not just some "pill" or "quick fix"? You become a better talker, the same way you lose weight, perfect your golf swing, enhance your significant other relationship (OOPS - did I hit a nerve??) - you practice EVERYDAY. As a life coach, I work with people that want the quick fix and are not really ready to commit to the discipline in both time and effort to achieve what they say they want. I used to waste their money and my time coddling. I don't do that any more. A person either wants to change, alter OR stay the same - neither I nor anyone else can CHANGE that decision. Let's see how well you do:
What is the name of the person who delivers your mail?
What is the name of the person who drops off the UPS?
Do you know the janitor at your place of employment?
How about the assistant at your lawyer's office, your dentist's office, your doctor's office?
Who is the guy that picks up your trash?
Do you know the store manager at your favorite grocery store? How about the cashier?
The person who brings you your water at your favorite restaurant?
That is 11 people, can you reach 10 today?...not just today - but everyday? They do not have to become your best buddy - but think about the outcomes? In 1 single year - you meet over 3.600 people....you will get better at talking, learn something new and warm a few hearts. Go where the "followers ain't" ...A reminder: "Talk with the masses and you will always eat with the best classes. Talk only with the rich and you will always be just their little ______ (well you know).....Hey Vestavia - you catch that???? Conversation is a lost art - but it is the key that will unlock your soul. Just like anything else though - you have to participate and practice. It truly is who KNOWs you and not WHO you know....Still don't believe that? That's ok...there is always next year (for you)....
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